David And Bathsheba
2 Samuel 11:1-27
According to a survey of 100,000 people:
- 23% of men and 20% of women will commit adultery.
- And 60% of those affairs will originate at work.
- If the person who committed adultery confesses their adultery, 57% of those marriages will stay together.
- Only 7% of affairs end up as a marriage.
- 75% of marriages that came from an affair end in divorce.
Source: *The Truth About Infidelity From Almost 100,000 People*, Savoie, J. M., Zinck, M., & Fisher, M. L. (2023). Between the Lines of Betrayal: An examination of a large-scale survey on sex differences in infidelity behaviors, motivations, and outcomes.
1. The circumstances that led to adultery
1st Character crack: Indulgence
2 Samuel 11:1 (NIV)
In the spring, at the time when kings go off to war, David sent Joab out with the king's men and the whole Israelite army. They destroyed the Ammonites and besieged Rabbah. But David remained in Jerusalem.
2 Samuel 11:2a (NIV)
One evening David got up from his bed and walked around on the roof of the palace.
2nd Character crack: complacency brought on by success
3rd Character crack: spiritually lethargic
4th Character crack: unrestrained selfishness
2 Samuel 11:2 (NIV)
One evening David got up from his bed and walked around on the roof of the palace. From the roof he saw a woman bathing. The woman was very beautiful.
> Bathsheba was taking a special kind of bath (v.4) a ritual performed by Yahweh-worshipers desiring to become ceremonially clean after menstruation (see Lev. 15:19-20, 28-30). Unlike what is popularly depicted in art, there is no indication Bathsheba bathed on her roof.
— Dr. Sandra Glahn, DTS Professor
2 Samuel 11:3 (NIV)
and David sent someone to find out about her. The man said, "Isn't this Bathsheba, the daughter of Eliam and the wife of Uriah the Hittite?"
2 Samuel 23:34, 39 (NIV)
34 Eliam son of Ahithophel the Gilonite,
39 and Uriah the Hittite.
2 Samuel 11:4-5 (NIV)
4 Then David sent messengers to get her. She came to him, and he slept with her. (She had purified herself from her uncleanness.) Then she went back home.
5 The woman conceived and sent word to David, saying, "I am pregnant."
James 1:14-15 (NLT)
14 Temptation comes from our own desires, which entice us and drag us away.
15 These desires give birth to sinful actions. And when sin is allowed to grow, it gives birth to death.
1st Imagination
2nd Enticed
> In our members there is a slumbering inclination towards desire which is both sudden and fierce. With irresistible power desire seizes mastery over the flesh. All at once a secret, smoldering fire is kindled. The flesh burns and is in flames. It makes no difference whether it is sexual desire, or ambition, or vanity, or desire for revenge, or love of fame and power, or greed for money, or finally, that strange desire for the beauty of the world. Joy in God is extinguished in us and we seek all our joy in the creature. At this moment God is quite unreal to us, He loses all reality, and only desire for the creature is real; the only reality is the devil. Satan does not here fill us with hatred of God, but with forgetfulness of God... The lust thus aroused envelops the mind and will of man in deepest darkness. The powers of clear discrimination and decision are taken from us...
It is here that everything within [us] rises up against the Word of God... Therefore the Bible teaches us in times of temptation in the flesh to flee. There is no resistance to Satan other than flight.
Every struggle against lust in one's own strength is doomed to
failure.
—Dietrich Bonhoeffer, *Temptation*
3rd Sin is conceived
4th Sin leads to death
Proverbs 14:12 (NIV)
There is a way that seems right to a man, but in the end it leads to death.
2. The consequences of adultery
2 Samuel 11:6-11, 14-15 (NIV)
6 So David sent this word to Joab: "Send me Uriah the Hittite." And Joab sent him to David.
7 When Uriah came to him, David asked him how Joab was, how the soldiers were and how the war was going.
8 Then David said to Uriah, "Go down to your house and wash your feet." So Uriah left the palace, and a gift from the king was sent after him.
9 But Uriah slept at the entrance to the palace with all his master's servants and did not go down to his house.
10 When David was told, "Uriah did not go home," he asked him, "Haven't you just come from a distance? Why didn't you go home?"
11 Uriah said to David, "The ark and Israel and Judah are staying in tents, and my master Joab and my lord's men are camped in the open fields. How could I go to my house to eat and drink and lie with my wife? As surely as you live, I will not do such a thing!"
14 In the morning David wrote a letter to Joab and sent it with Uriah.
15 In it he wrote, "Put Uriah in the front line where the fighting is fiercest. Then withdraw from him so he will be struck down and die."
1. A marriage was broken
2. A friend, a mighty man, & a husband was murdered
3. A toddler died
4. There was a prophecy that God would bring calamity on David out of his own family. And that someone close to David would sleep with his wives in broad daylight
5. David’s son Amnon raped David’s daughter Tamar
6. David’s son Absalom murdered Amnon
7. Absalom led a Civil War against David
8. Absalom listened to the advice of Bathsheba’s grandfather and had sex with 10 of his father’s concubines
9. Absalom died in a battle where he was trying to kill David
3. The precautions to avoid adultery
1st Remember the cost of sin
Sin will take you farther than you want to go, keep you longer than you want to stay, and cost you more than you want to pay.
Proverbs 5:1, 3, 8-14, 18 (NIV)
1 My son, pay attention to my wisdom, listen well to my words of insight,
3 The lips of an adulteress drip honey, and her speech is smoother than oil.
8 Keep to a path far from her, do not go near the door of her house,
9 lest you give your best strength to others and your years to one who is cruel,
10 lest strangers feast on your wealth and your toil enrich another man's house.
11 At the end of your life you will groan, when your flesh and body are spent.
12 You will say, "How I hated discipline! How my heart spurned correction!
13 I would not obey my teachers or listen to my instructors.
14 I have come to the brink of utter ruin in the midst of the whole assembly."
18 May your fountain be blessed, and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth.
Proverbs 6:27-29 (NIV)
27 Can a man scoop fire into his lap without his clothes being burned?
28 Can a man walk on hot coals without his feet being scorched?
29 So is he who sleeps with another man's wife; no one who touches her will go unpunished.
2nd Realize there is a way out of sin
1 Corinthians 10:12-13 (NIV)
12 So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don't fall!
13 No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.
3rd Recognize the Signs That You Are Headed for Trouble with Sin
- When are you so busy there is not time to be alone with God.
- When you feel you deserve more attention than you are getting at home.
- When the romance in your marriage is fading.
- When you enjoy fantasizing about an illicit relationship.
- When you wouldn't want you wife or your colleagues to see what
you are reading or looking at.
- When you hope God isn't looking or listening.
4th Resolve to embrace standards that will protect your marriage
1. Never drive alone in a car with a member of the opposite sex unless it
is your wife. (Avoid private personal conversations, DM’s & texts)
2. Be careful about embracing - never hug a member of the opposite sex
when you are alone.
3. Be careful about paying compliments to members of the opposite sex
on their appearance.
4. Avoid flirtation.
5. Remember the commitments that you have made to your spouse and
reinforce them verbally and with gifts.
6. Spend quality & quantity time with your mate.
> “I know some of you are going to think I'm being too careful. That I have gone too far, but no one thinks he needs hedges until it's too late.” --- Jerry Jenkins, Loving Your Marriage Enough to Protect It
